Parenting

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Parenting

What Makes a Perfect Parent

4oz of Love, 3oz of Brains and a Heaped Tablespoon of Fun. English children unveil their recipe for the Perfect Parent. The world’s most sought-after recipe has finally been revealed by the nation’s children - how to make the Perfect Parent!

More than 1,000 children across England were interviewed on behalf of leading parenting support groups Dad Talk and Netmums, and asked what they think makes the ideal mum and dad;

'Children Describe A Perfect Parent'

77% agree the best mums give lots of cuddles

75% said the best dads play with them

· Cheering along at school activities such as plays and sports events is also a vital part of being a good parent say half of England's kids (51%)

· While nearly half (44%) wanted parents to help them with homework

And despite nearly all parents, whether mums, dads, step-parents or other carers, believing they failed at times to be a good role model, the majority of children (70%) said they would be just like their mum or dad if they were parents. 64% even said their parents were clever enough to run the country!

However despite this confidence boost, English parents put themselves under real pressure to be 'perfect' themselves.

98% felt they fail to be a good role model at times, despite 62% striving to be the best they can.

Nearly half (49%) admit to feeling stressed or anxious at the thought of being a role model to their children

Six out of 10 parents (61%) feel they're not patient enough with their children. One in five (21%) believe they're not successful enough to be good parents and 46% agree they'd like more time with their children.

Netmums believe that by placing unnecessary levels of pressure on themselves parents are risk forgetting who their children admire the most.

“Being a parent is arguably the hardest jobs around but I urge parents to remember that no one's perfect, and that's ok,” explains Siobhan Freegard from Netmums.

“Children learn more from their parents than anyone else, so it is a big responsibility, but the most important thing is to try to relax and enjoy spending time with your child. A happy, loving parent is a much better role model than an anxious, self critical one.”

To help take the pressure off parents trying to be the role model role, the experts at Dad Talk and Netmums have listed some simple steps parents can try:

When you talk to your children really listen to what they have to say – give them twenty minutes of your time each day to focus purely on them. If you treat them like this, they'll also learn to respect others' opinions as they grow up.

Catch your child doing something right rather than doing something wrong. It can be something as simple as, ‘That’s lovely to see you sitting at the table’. Praising positive behaviour leads to more good behaviour.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you’re feeling stressed or anxious – there are lots of organisations out there who can help. Try ParentlinePlus on 0808 800 2222, www.netmums.com, or log onto the DadTalk forum, Pub Talk, on www.dadtalk.co.uk

Try not to lose control in front of your children - or they'll learn that to get what they want they need to shout and scream. Count to 10 and focus on calming down or, if the child is older and you can, remove yourself from the situation. You could try and call a supportive friend or family member to help you calm down before dealing with the problem or meet other parents in the same situation as you at netmums.com or dadtalk.co.uk

Show your child how much you love them. You know your child best, so think about what means most to him or her - whether it’s cuddles and kisses, holding their hand, or just watching them while they play.

Don't try to be a perfect parent. Instead, aim to be a happy parent, which means building in a bit of balance and a bit of time for you! And happy parents = happy children!

This Sunday, Netmums and Dad Talk are also calling for a National Bonding Day. Matt Buttery from Dad Talk explains, “This research reminds us that it's the simple things that children crave more than anything else. Taking time to relax and making our children feel loved and special is one of the most important things we can all do so this Sunday we want everyone to take time out to spend with their children – whether it’s a kick about in the park or just giving them lots of cuddles and kisses!"

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Published in Parenting

High Street travel agents attacked over high prices

headteachers angry over high street travel agents

The National Association of Headteachers on the rising cost of holidays has attacked High Street travel agents who include First Choice and Thomas Cook. As in2town as reported, travel agents such as First Choice have increased their prices during the school holiday period making it more harder for families to have a holiday but now the National Association of Headteachers is asking how much profit do companies like First Choice really have to make.

Struggling families have seen prices of family holidays increase this year even though we are still going through the hassle of the credit crunch and those prices increase further when it comes to the school holidays. With the prices increasing, some families are looking at taking their children out of school during school term time to save money on holidays, while other families face another year without a family holiday.

'Teachers Not Happy With High Street Travel Agents'

A lot of families are now turning to the internet in their bid to make their own package holidays by booking cheap flights online and cheap hotels, missing out the travel agents and at the same time saving them money, allowing them to go on a family holiday at a more affordable rate.

In2town have looked at holidays from 2011 and we compared them to holidays for 2012 for a normal family of four, and we have found that some holidays have increased by around £1,500 where as the Daily Mail have looked at holidays and have seen travel agents have penalised parents who do not take their children out of school during term time, by around £2,300. This leaves the question, should you ignore the school wishes and face a fine and ruin your children’s education to save yourself this huge amount or should the government step in and shake the travel industry on its head and make holidays more affordable to the average family.

A spokesperson for the National Association of Headteachers commented:

“We know holiday companies are out to make a profit, but you have to ask how much.”

This is a question that families who are struggling to take their children on holiday are asking who take the risk of a fine or even jail if they take their children out of school during term time.

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Published in Parenting

Thirty Thousand Pregnant Women a Year Lose Their Jobs

Rights for women seem to be getting further and further away as a recent report has revealed that there has been a sharp rise in the number of women who have lost their jobs through maternity leave or through pregnancy.

Leading campaign group have claimed that the sharp increase is a result of employers not wanting to foot their members of staff maternity costs and as a result mothers and expectant mothers are losing their job and lively hood.

'Pregnant Women Are Being Sacked'

The Alliance Against Pregnancy Discrimination in the Workplace has said that there has been a sharp increase in the number of women consulting lawyers or calling help lines because their jobs have been terminated during maternity leave or pregnancy.

The alliance told The Guardian: "It appears that some employers are using the recession as an excuse to break the law on discrimination."

Campaigners have said that the "long-term consequences of job loss as a result of pregnancy or maternity leave jeopardise women's financial security for their whole lives".

It is reported that 30,000 women each year lose their jobs due to pregnancy, however this figure is set to rise due to the credit crunch according to the Equality and Human Rights Commission.

Elizabeth Gardiner, parliamentary policy officer at Working Families, a campaign group on work-life balance that is part of the alliance, said women had approached them with more severe examples of discrimination in recent months. "Employers seem much more willing to flout the law," she said.

Campaigners are concerned that attitudes towards maternity rights have hardened among many employers whose businesses are struggling in the economic downturn.

The alliance believes that new mothers will be seen as "fair game" for dismissal during the recession.

And key business leaders such as Sir Alan Sugar are fuelling this hostility in the business world towards enhanced maternity rights.

Sugar is reported to have said: "We have maternity laws where people are entitled to have too much. Everything has gone too far."

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